The past few weeks have been very difficult for me. I have struggled so much with my emotions about being in the hospital away from my precious children and my sweet husband. Although I know my children are well, and my husband is truly amazing, I'm still the mommy. The mommy in me wants to be there, longs to be there, and desires to do all that mommy's do. However, I have had to accept that just can't be right now. I am thankful that I see my precious children every day, which is much more than most women here. I am thankful for all the prayers, thoughts, and help we have received in the past few weeks. I am most thankful for my Lord and Savior who has carried us this far, and I know he isn't letting us go anytime soon.
I had a visit from my general OB this morning. This was not a routine visit, but a visit out of care and concern for me being here. He sat with me a while, and then began to be forthright and honest with me about our precious Elizabeth Grace. As we talked, he told me how he had been in contact with my doctors in Florida. There were three doctors who saw and/or treated me while there. He said after speaking with them, there was a common consensus I would not make it out of the 19th week before delivering our precious girl to the Lord. Once we arrived back in Georgia, I immediately saw my general OB for a follow up after the long trip home. At that point, I sensed worry, but again, at that time, he was shielding us from what we didn't realize was the seriousness of our situation. He told me when he sent me to the specialists and admitted me to Labor and Delivery, he just knew in 48 hours he would deliver our girl. All indications were I was developing and infection and my stitch was weakening to the pressure of my membranes. After 48 hours, once again, they were shocked. They moved me to the High Risk Unit still believing by weeks end, we would deliver our precious girl. He said no doctor reviewing my chart felt she would make it to 20 weeks.
As we approach Monday we are entering week 21. Elizabeth Grace, is growing ahead of her schedule, maintaining an amazing heartrate, and plays and plays. She plays so much at times in the evening I have to rock in the bed to calm her and most times, the nurses have to chase her to get her heartrate. My blood pressure is "phenomenal" never fluctuating, and I have never run a temperature, and all blood work indicates no infection. In fact, the beginnings of the infection seen last Monday is no longer there. That brings me to where I am today. There have been six doctors professionally feel our girl wouldn't make it. Our journey is far from over, but each day draws us closer to Him and His promises to us. We could not be more proud to travel this journey as her mother and father. We are brought to tears, He chose us and our children to be the testimony of His Grace and the power of Prayer.
Although this journey is difficult, God has proven Himself the one and only physician. He knows Elizabeth Grace's destiny and He is the only one who knows how long she'll remain in my womb, in our arms, or with Him. My human flesh becomes scared at times, and I do cry a lot. However, I am always comforted by the Love only He can give and the Peach only He can provide.