When walking a journey of this nature, it is so easy to become a bit self-centered. At times, I do find myself sitting here feeling sorry for me. However, I am quickly reminded of the life within me that so desperately needs me and that's why I am here. I hear my children's voices on the phone and am reminded of the love that awaits me at home. At the end of each day, I hear the voice of my husband remind me all will be well, and I am reminded of his heart and it hurts too.
So, no, it's not all about me. There is an amazing man behind the scenes keeping us all together. That man is my husband. I felt the need to make my blog today about him. He seems so forgotten, however, he is the rock we are all leaning on and the glue keeping us all together. Just as my heavenly father is carrying us and holding us tightly, so is my husband. The blessing here....neither one is letting go.
In the past 10 years I have spent with Fred, he rarely shows emotion. I guess that's the "man" in him. However, as the years have gone by, I can honestly say, I can read him better than he reads himself at times.
Raising a teenager is not easy. However, as we have raised Amber together, Fred has always demonstrated patience and love for her in so many ways. Always reassuring me, "we will get through this together, as a family".
I recall last summer as I was discharged after having William. As we sat in our room waiting on the nurse to "wheel" me out, I couldn't compose myself enough to enter the halls. I was a mess. I vividly remember Fred grabbing my two arms and looking straight into my eyes as he whispered to me "be strong, we'll get through this one step at a time together". So, as he promised, we did.
In March, we had our house fire. As I cried in disbelief and fear, once again, he held me in his arms and once again reassured me "we will get through this together". The days were long, but we did, as a family, weather that storm.
As we enter this journey and begin walking this path, my husband reminds me daily "we will get through this together". He is consistent in his devotion to me as his wife, and his role as the father to our two children at home. I do worry about my children, I am their mother. However, I don't worry about them being safe, loved, and nurtured. I know in my absence, God has given me and my children an amazing man that carries the load with so much more patience than I ever could. Never once has he become frustrated. Through the long days, many, many miles traveled to and from the hospital, and long work days, he always shows up with a smile that reassures me "we will get through this together". More today than ever, those words ring so true to me.
As a family, we are walking this journey. So in my selfish moments, I am reminded of the beautiful lives that await me at home; the two children that light up when they come in my room to visit, and the amazing husband that just simply picked up right where I left off and hasn't missed a beat! So as each day passes, I know beyond a doubt, just as our heavenly father is holding tight to us, we, as a family "will get through this together".
Jamie I hear you. I was on bed rest with the twins for 6 weeks and you do feel like you just disapear from the world, but being where you are is where you need to be for Eliazbeth's sake. From reading your blog and knowing Fred myself (even for a short time) I know he is doing an exceptional job. It does take its toll on you not knowing what is going to happen next and not being able to do anything. This is truely a time to spend with GOD. I have told Fred if there is anything I can do to let me know. Fred just sent me this blog and I am so blessed and encouraged reading it. You and Fred are amazing. God will give us strength to get through anything as long as we allow Him to. Remeber in our weakness His strenght is perfect. It is not selfish to want to be with your family and God knows that we are only human. Sometimes as Christians we feel we shouldn't want things for ourselves but He wants to know all of our feelings not just the good ones. I will keep you and your family in my prayers daily. I will also keep in touch.
ReplyDeleteTake care and GOD BLESS>
Aleshia Steele
Thank you Aleshia. Duluth has been such a source of strength for both Fred and our family. A true example of a faculty as family rather than co-workers. What a testament to the leadership there. When God placed Fred there, little did we know how much Duluth would come to mean to our family. We do love each of you, and the many thoughts and prayers are surely felt and seen as our precious Elizabeth Grace grows each day.
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